The phone starts beeping - it's 6 o'clock - time to get up so we can be on our way back to Bangkok

Glen hits snooze

Ten minutes later it beeps again

"Kim, you can have first shower"

"No Glen, I''ve hardly slept - my bites were itching all ****ing night - you don't understand cos they don't bite you"

I start to whimper
"It feels like there's things wiggling under my skin - MY SKIN IS CRAWLING!"

I'm knackered, sore, and been kept awake by the croaking frogs in a pipe, and the fact that out wooden bungalow over the river is full of mozzies, and roasting hot

We could have paid a little extra and had air conditioning, but all for the sake of saving 200baht ($6NZ), we went with a fan!

Glen forces himself out of bed, complaining that he is sore and the bed was to hard, and he's sick of hearing me whinge about being itchy!!

6:26am
"Hello....Hello....Taxi" says the little Thai man standing at our door

"It's not 6:30 yet, they said 6:30, I'm not ready" I complain

Glen and I start stuffing the rest of our stuff in our packs

The night before, while we laughed about how grumpy we had been at each other during the day, we promised we would try to be kinder to each other and start fresh next day

Not to happen!
Within a few minutes, we are at each others throats, all completely irrelevant stuff, just general bitching about everything

By the time we get to the the train station, after Glen argues with the driver cos he charged us far too much, we end up sitting at opposite ends of the bench

The so called 7.00am train is 45 minutes late, it's already sweltering, we're sweating, hungry, and tired, and throwing evil glances at one another!!

To make things even better, the train pulls up, and is already completely chockers, not a seat nor barely any standing room
Glen starts expressing just how pissed off he is, rather loudly, and with colourful use of the English language, and everyone is staring at us

It's a 3 hour 45 minute ride back to Bangkok, and luckily twenty minutes in we find a seat, cos 'G' was ready to explode!!

There's no air conditioning, nor fan - just far too many hot sweaty bodies jammed in

The hilltribe lady sitting opposite us is chewing tobacco, and rubbing it on her gums, then she regurgitates it into a bag, and smiles at me

I want to punch her smiling face - it makes me want to spew, and the smell is horrendous!

Glen is being entertained by a Chinese lady, sitting next to the tobacco lady, who is using some sort of hand signals out the window, while laughing to herself, and every now and then yelling real loud, and giving tobacco lady an evil grin, who sits and laughs at her

Step off the train - we need to find our way to Hau Lampong station, so we can leave our bags for a few hours til we catch the overnight train to Chiang Mai
Taxi drivers won't give us a reasonable price cos they know we need them (they want $8NZ, we want to pay 4!), and the tuk-tuks are to hot and take too long

We start yelling at each other, cos Glen thinks we need to go one way, and I think the opposite
We finally agree, and decide $8 is fine!

Our bags are being looked after, hopefully, and we head off to the big day market

It is incredibly hot - the locals are even complaing of the heat, and the market trip becomes a nightmare

The Thai market sellers are all grumpy and hot, Glen's nose is getting redder and redder, and he still can't seem to find a hat even though there's about sixty stalls selling them!

He wants to look at every watch and every knive stall, and I want to look at all the clothes and homegoods - and neither one of us is being patient with the other

Several hours later, no bargains found, we pay to have a shower, then climb on board what we thought might be a fun trip to Chiang Mai

We paid for second-class sleeper, fan - no air conditioning, cos Lonely Planet Travel claims it's actually quite cool on the train in the evenings
Our little sleeping booth seems sweet, albeit hot, and we think it will be cool once we get moving

The guy comes and turns our seats into beds
I'm supposed to be up top, and Glen on bottom, but it is so hot on the top bunk, that the sheets feel like they have come out of an oven
Not even sitting up there for two minutes, and I'm dripping sweat!
I look around - everyone else is exactly the same
It's going to be a long night!
Glen was kind enough to let me squash down the bottom with him
We barely slept all night
We were dripping wet in the morning, and our so called 13 hours became 17!

We hop off the train, pushing and yelling at each other, which seems to be the norm for this holiday, and make our way to the taxi stand

We have decided that we are staying somewhere nice for the first night, so it's off to Gap's Guesthouse

So the saying goes - "It's all part of travelling" - and if I hear another person say that like it's a positive - AGGGGHHHH!!
Even though we are on a two month holiday in Thailand, it doesn't mean it's actually a holiday
At times it would be much easier to be back at work
And then I hear you say - "Ahh, but it's all worth it in the end, and think of all the experiences you've had"
I say to you - "You try it, then tell me the same!"

All in all, it will be worth it in the end, but sometimes it's hard to see the good, and funny side, especially when you covered in infected bites, your barely speaking to your new husband, there's no toilet paper and you've forgotten yours and you've just done a poo!!

And everytime you pick up a dress or skirt you have to listen to the Thais say - "You too big for that one, I have very big for you" as they refer to your hips and your arse!

Goodnight and take care

Hugs and kisses
Kim and Glen......Slater!